Amesty International Are Self-Righteous Shits

NEWARK, New Jersey — On the list of self-righteous-bull-shitters, slightly below the Nazi PETA, but above those awful self-torturing vegans, are human rights groups, the most notorious of them all, Amnesty International. As the name does not suggest, Amnesty’s goal is not anything close to amnesty for anyone, except maybe for the group’s own bullshit morals.

Amnesty’s goal, and I’ll even quote the site’s own words is supposedly to “campaign for internationally recognized human rights. (Amnesty.org, 07/25/2006)”

Human rights? When I think human rights I think about the right to have enough subsistence to survive. Anyone would think that is an important right, but that’s not on Amnesty’s agenda when they protest sweatshops and underage employment in developing nations.

It’s rather easy for a bunch of Amnesty fucks out in their designer t-shirts, drinking bottled spring water, and shoving food into their fat fucking mouths to tell the world’s poorest that they deserve better working conditions.

If the poverty driven inhabitants of developing countries were able to get better jobs, they would. Sweatshops just happen to be comparatively the best working conditions available. If companies were going to increase pay to the “standards” of Amnesty, companies would not bother outsourcing in the first place. Like religious nuts, Amnesty does not understand that people are perfectly capable of making their own decisions, if workers felt that they were able to push for better conditions, well you had better guess they would.

Nonetheless, logic does not stop Amnesty. In one case, Amnesty lobbied Wal-Mart to ban underage workers in their sweatshops in India. “They’ll go back to school,” says Amnesty (very few of them did). The rest of the children went to find work to help support their families, boys going into more backbreaking labor, and girls into child prostitution. Nicely done Amnesty you stupid shits, because what goes better with human rights than child prostitution.

What are human rights Amnesty, when humans determine everything relative to those of others? The vast majority of the Amnesty Propaganda is so out of basic economic thinking that it hides the minute amount important issues they manage to work on. Another complaint on China’s middle class one child law? Take it up with my friends Overpopulation and Disease.

My advice to you Amnesty, get the fuck out of politics entirely and stick to protesting against discrimination. Hire yourself a logical thinker before taking action, high school children are not the most straight shooters. In high school I knew a short fat four-eyed fuck in the school's Amesty International group who made paper flowers to send to domestically abused Turkish women, I think the stupidity of Amesty speaks for itself.

RIAA and MPAA Sues Unborn Fetus for Proprietary Loss

NEWARK, New Jersey — The Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) and Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) have filed a joint lawsuit against Unborn Fetus, and Does 1-10 in a California District Court seeking relief for “irreparable harm.” The lawsuit demands reparations of $600,000.

Court papers filed on January 21, 2006 allege that Unborn Fetus and Does 1-10 have come under the enjoyment of several movies and songs originally sold to their soon-to-be mothers. The suit claims that the defendants have not reimbursed the plaintiff for the proprietary work of companies represented by the two trade groups.

“We have been unable to name our defendant due to the fact that he is currently lodged in the abdomen of a 25 year old woman,” says MPAA lawyer Kerri O’Connor. “We seek preliminary and permanent injunctive relief through the immediate abortion of Unborn Fetus and Does 1-10.”Unborn Fetus has suffered serious abnormalities, which doctors correlate to the pending lawsuit.

Unborn Fetus has suffered serious abnormalities, which doctors correlate to the pending lawsuit.

Asked who Does 1-10 implicated she answered, “We believe that other mothers with their fetuses have been walking in and out of the room. We don’t know whether the Fetuses are conspiring to watch movies together, and committing other crime, but it costs the same to sue one person as it does a hundred people.”

Tests show that Unborn Fetus has been under extremely high stress and has been unable to carry about normal day-to-day fetus activities as of late.

In February 2006, the RIAA and other copyright industry associations filed that that space shifting and format shifting, such as transfering music from a CD to a computer, do not count as non-infringing use, even if that person owns the CDs.

A statement released by Cary Sherman, president of the RIAA said, “We believe that Unborn Fetus has been involved in listening to music played on the Apple iPoo during the mother’s pregnancy. The action clearly violates the Digital Millennium Copyright Act.”

Sherman then continued to spit out a series of incomprehensible lawyer jargon.


The soon-to-be-mother Vonnessa McBride, 25, is not happy, she exclaims, “How is I suppose to control what my Fetus do! They ask me to get an abortion because he or she is in the same room watching them crap movies and hearing them shitty songs with me?” She added angrily, “This is just some white ass bullshit from some man named after a woman. He knows I gots no money in the bank and barely manage to feed myself, how many folks like me do they sue to pay for them big ass $700,000 house in Burbank.”


Sherman, quickly changed the subject when mentioned the insult on his feminine name answering, “Kids today are always on their Googles, and their Internets. They always try to World Wide Webbing their music. Unborn Fetus should have known to shut its developing eyes and ears when he or she heard the music playing. In that case, we would have agreed to a $500,000 settlement, because he did still listen to the beginning of the song and/or movie.”
On the sideline, Ms. Kerri O’Connor chimed in, “We at the RIAA and MPAA are doing great things! Should Unborn Fetus settle with our generous offer of $600,000 he or she will have learned a great lesson…that can only extreme poverty can teach best.”

Betting on the Stock Market

The point of the market is to dump your shares to the bigger fool and anyone who invests their money in it know that the system is a fraud. Assuming you don't have hundreds of thousands of dollars that you're willing to lose, your net return is not worth the risk of your loss. Forget about paying your child's college outragous $40,000/yr college tuition, you would be lucky to keep up with inflation.

Ten Points for capitalism, the stock market truly is an efficient system…at screwing people. For the cash I spend to buy shares of Wal-Mart, I could go to Taiwan and buy myself three sweatshop kids to make me cheap stuff first hand, literally. If you’re not up for exploiting Taiwan labor, you’re a communist. Trading stocks of companies that exploit cheap Taiwan labor makes you a coward.

I was playing with my cash at the stock exchange for the last couple of months, so far, I'm up a unbelivable 37%, am I happy? No. It was obviously fake money.

Here are three simple questions to determine what you should do as an investor.

1. You are a risk taker with exceptional talent in mathematics can predict human behavior


2. You are very lucky


3. You have illegal insider information on corporations
   

If you answered yes to number 1 and/or 2, the answer is quite simple: get the hell out of stock trading and buy into a good mutual fund where they can care for your special needs. Monkeys can pick stocks as well as any stock analyst, proven fact, look it up.

Investing in the US and A

In his 2005 State of the Union Address, President Bush, highlighted the idea of privatizing social security, which would allow a portion of individual income to go into the stock market. This plan however, fractures more easily than fossilized crap.

The United States taxes regressively, the more you make the less you pay. For example, this website generates an average of $1 a day (it's really more like $0.25), while a friend of mine makes $1,000 a day. If I buy a bottle of Uncle Sam’s Propaganda-Punch-in-the-Face for $1, the 6% sales tax represents 6% of my daily income but only 0.006% of my friend’s. Though I sleep well at night knowing that I pay back such a high percentage of my income to society, I can't help but wonder whether I'm getting a bad deal.

No matter what The Wealth of Nations claim, capitalism is a win-lose game. Unless you are an US Senator, you will not beat the market by 12% annually (New Yorker 2005-10-31). The odds of beating the market long term is decent, but don’t kid yourself into thinking there won’t be a large group of elderly whose investments will get screwed worse than Dick Cheney’s lesbian daughter.

Final Words of Wisdom

To the low capital investor, invest what you’re willing to lose, capitalism is best at taking the little guy's money.

The "stockster" team (little white guy, fat white guy and black guy), those are bullshitters who probably snuck into someone's company to take the photo.

Don’t fall for scammers like thestockster.com. These are pumpers who ride a stock up like a cheap whore and then sell them faster than europeans give small pox blankets.

Finally, don't fall for those fat guys on tv telling you to come to their stock seminars...scam.

"Hello, suicide hotline?"